Archive for the “Funny One Liner” Category

• But love is blind, and lovers cannot see what petty follies they themselves commit. ~ William Shakespeare
• Hatred is blind, as well as love. ~  Oscar Wilde
• He who loves thinks that the others are blind; the others think that he is crazy. ~ Arabian
• It is not love that should be depicted as blind, but self-love. ~ Voltaire
• Look your best – who said love is blind? ~ Mae West
• Love blinds us to faults, but hatred blinds us to virtues. ~ Iba Ezra
• Love comes from blindness, friendship from knowledge. ~ Comte De Bussy-Rabutin
• Love is blind — but not the neighbors. ~ Mexican Proverb
• Love is blind — marriage is the eye-opener. ~ Pauline Thomason
• Love is blind and marriage is the institution for the blind. ~ James Graham
• Love is blind and thinks that others don’t see either. ~ Danish Proverb
• Love is one-eyed, hate is blind. ~ Danish Proverb
• Love is blind to blemishes and fault. ~ Irish Proverb
• Love is blind, so you have to feel your way. ~ Brazilian Proverb
• Love is blind; friendship closes its eyes. ~ Traditional Proverb
• Love is not blind – it sees more, not less.  But because it sees more, it is willing to see less.  ~Julins Gordon
• Love is said to be blind, but I know some fellows in love who can see twice as much in their sweethearts as I do. ~ Josh Billings
• Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind, and therefore is winged Cupid painted blind. ~ William Shakespeare
• Love makes a man both blind and deaf. ~ Arabian Proverb
• Love may be blind but jealousy has 20-20 vision. ~ Author Unknown
• Love may be blind, but it can sure find its way around in the dark! ~ Author Unknown
• Love to faults is always blind, always is to joy inclined. Lawless, winged, and unconfined, and breaks all chains from every mind. ~ William Shakespeare
• Love works a different way in different minds, the fool it enlightens and the wise it blinds. ~ John Dryden
• Love, like a chicken salad or restaurant hash, must be taken with blind faith or it loses its flavor. ~ Helen Rowland
• Lovers always think that other people are blind. ~ Spanish Proverb
• Self-love is blind. ~ Dutch Proverb
• Self-love is often rather arrogant than blind; it does not hide our faults from ourselves, but persuades us that they escape the notice of others. ~ Samuel Johnson
• Whoever said love is blind is dead wrong. Love is the only thing that lets us see each other with the remotest accuracy. ~ Martha Beck

Behind every able man, there are always other able men. ~ Chinese Proverb

Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes. ~ Jim Carrey

Behind every great man there is a great woman; and behind that woman is his wife. ~ Author Unknown

Behind every man is a good woman. ~ Author Unknown

Behind every successful man are a few ex-wives and a line of new prospects. ~ Author Unknown

Behind every successful man is a proud wife and a surprised mother-in-law. ~ Hubert H. Humphrey

Behind every successful man there are a lot of unsuccessful years. ~  Bob Brown

Behind every successful man you’ll find a woman who has nothing to wear. ~ Harold Coffin

Behind every successful man, there is a woman – And behind every unsuccessful man, there are two. ~ Author Unknown

Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman. ~ Sim York Soo

Behind the man is the Tree of Life, bearing twelve fruits, and the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil is behind the woman; the serpent is twining round it. ~ Arthur E. Waite

The road to success is filled with women pushing their husbands along. ~ Lord Dewar

• Every great man, every successful man, no matter what the field of endeavor, has known the magic that lies in these words: every adversity has the seed of an equivalent or greater benefit. ~ W. Clement Stone
• Every man after his fashion. ~ Traditional Proverb
• Every man assumes the colors of his surroundings. ~ Chinese Proverb
• Every man becomes, to a certain degree, what the people he generally converses with are. ~ Philip Dormer Stanhope
• Every man believes that he has greater possibilities. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson
• Every man dies. Not every man really lives. ~ Brave Heart Movie
• Every man for himself and God for us all. ~ Spanish Proverb
• Every man for himself, and the devil take the hindmost. ~ Traditional Proverb
• Every man forges his own destiny. ~ Latvian Proverb
• Every man goes down to his death bearing in his hands only that which he has given away. ~ Persian Proverb
• Every man has a fool up his sleeve. ~ United States Proverb
• Every man has a mission from God to help his fellow beings. ~ James Gibbons
• Every man has a property in his own person. This nobody has a right to, but himself. ~ John Locke
• Every man has a rainy corner of his life whence comes foul weather which follows him. ~ Jean Paul Richter
• Every man has a right to be conceited until he is successful. ~ Benjamin Disraeli
• Every man has a right to utter what he thinks truth, and every other man has a right to knock him down for it. Martyrdom is the test. ~ Samuel Johnson
• Every man has a sane spot somewhere. ~ Robert Louis Stevenson
• Every man has his own vocation, talent is the call. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson
• Every man has one black patch, and some have two. ~ United States Proverb
• Every man in the world is better than someone else and not as good someone else. ~ William Saroyan
• Every man is a consumer and ought to be a producer. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson
• Every man is a fool in some man’s opinion. ~ Spanish Proverb
• Every man is a friend to him that giveth gifts. ~ The Holy Bible
• Every man is a prince in his own bed. ~ Malawian Proverb
• Every man is a volume if you know how to read him. ~ William Ellery Channing
• Every man is a whole volume, just dying to be read. ~ Author Unknown
• Every man is an omnibus in which his ancestors ride. ~ Oliver Wendell Holmes
• Every man is as heaven made him, and sometimes a great deal worse. ~ Miguel De Cervantes
• Every man is his own ancestor and every man his own heir. He devises his own fortune, and he inherits his own past. ~ Francis Herbert Hedge
• Every man is his own chief enemy. ~ Anacharsis
• Every man is his own worst enemy. ~ Traditional Proverb
• Every man is like the company he is wont to keep. ~ Euripides
• Every man is occasionally what he ought to be perpetually. ~ American Proverb
• Every man is said to have his peculiar ambition. ~ Abraham Lincoln
• Every man is surrounded by a neighborhood of voluntary spies. ~ Jane Austen
• Every man is the guardian of his own honor. ~ Indian Proverb
• Every man is the king of his own beard. ~ Iranian Proverb
• Every man is the son of his own works. ~ Miguel De Cervantes
• Every man knows that he must die, but no one believes it. ~ Yiddish Proverb
• Every man likes the smell of his own farts. ~ Icelandic Proverb
• Every man loves what he is good at. ~ Thomas Shadwell
• Every man must be content with that glory which he may have at home. ~ Boethius
• Every man must get to Heaven his own way. ~ Frederick the Great
• Every man needs two women, a quiet home-maker, and a thrilling nymph. ~ Iris Murdoch
• Every man now worships gold, all other reverence being done away. ~ Sextus Propertius
• Every man over forty is a scoundrel. ~ George Bernard Shaw
• Every man over forty is responsible for his face. ~ Abraham Lincoln
• Every man paddles his own canoe. ~ Frederick Marryat
• Every man shall give as he is able, according to the blessing of the Lord. ~ The Holy Bible
• Every man should make up his mind that if he expects to succeed, he must give an honest return for the other man’s dollar. ~ Edward H. Harriman
• Every man stamps his value on himself… man is made great or small by its own will. ~ Johann Friedrich Von Schiller
• Every man supposes himself not to be fully understood or appreciated. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson
• Every man thinks God is on his side. The rich and powerful know he is. ~ Jean Anouilh
• Every man thinks his own thoughts are best. ~ Afghan Proverb
• Every man to his taste, as the man said when he kissed his cow. ~ Scottish Proverb
• Every man to his trade. ~ Traditional Proverb
• Every man treats himself as society treats the criminal. ~ Harvey Fergusson
• Every man wants a woman to appeal to his better side, his nobler instincts and his higher nature — and another woman to help him forget them. ~ Helen Rowland
• Every man who possibly can should force himself to a holiday of a full month in a year, whether he feels like taking it or not. ~ William James
• Every man who praises himself brushes the luster from his best efforts. ~ Ellen Gould White
• Every man who says frankly and fully what he thinks is doing a public service. ~ Leslie Stephen
• Every man wishes to rule the world. Unfortunately, the world rules every man. ~ Jeremy P. Johnson
• Every man, however wise, needs the advice of some sagacious friend in the affairs of life. ~ Titus Maccius Plautus
• Every man, through fear, mugs his aspirations a dozen times a day. ~ Brendan Francis
• Every poor man has a dry throat and wet boots. ~ Yiddish Proverb
• Every smart man is an ignoramus who abuses his ignorance. ~ Cameroonian Proverb
• Every successful man I have heard of has done the best he could with conditions as he found them…~ Edgar Watson Howe
• Every wise man is afraid of a fool. ~ French Proverb

• A man’s worth depends on his two smallest organs: his heart and his tongue. ~ Arabian Proverb
• A teacher is someone who ploughs with his tongue to fill his little bowl with rice. ~ Chinese Proverb
• Before the tongue can speak, it must have lost the power to wound. ~ Peace Pilgrim
• Be slow of tongue and quick of eye. ~ Miguel De Cervantes
• Four horses cannot overtake the tongue. ~ Chinese Proverb
• God speaks a foreign tongue.~ Namibian Proverb
• He who knows little knows enough if he knows how to hold his tongue. ~ Italian Proverb
• If you have five wives, then you have five tongues. ~ African Proverb
• I gave so much advice that hair grew on my tongue.~ Iranian Proverb
• I have often repented speaking, but never of holding my tongue. ~ Xenocrates of Chalcedon
• In nine times out of ten, the slanderous tongue belongs to a disappointed person. ~ George Bancroft
• It was my tongue that swore; my heart is unsworn. ~ Euripides
• Let a fool hold his tongue and he will pass for a sage.~ Publilius Syrus
• Let not your tongue say what your head may pay for. ~ Italian Proverb
• Listen or your tongue will keep you deaf. ~ Native American Proverb
• Loose tongues are worse than wicked hands.~ Jewish Proverb
• Nature has given us two ears, two eyes, and but one tongue; to the end we should hear and see more than we speak.~ Greek Proverb
• Prayer requires more of the heart than of the tongue.~ Adam Clarke
• Sweet tongues buy horses on credit.~ Hawaiian Proverb
• Teach thy tongue to say, “I do not know.”. ~ Hebrew Proverb
• Teach your child to hold his tongue; he’ll learn fast enough to speak. ~ Benjamin Franklin
• Teeth placed in front of the tongue give good advice.~ Italian Proverb
• The body pays for a slip of the foot and gold pays for a slip of the tongue.~ Malawian Proverb
• The only sword that never rests is the tongue of a woman.~ Armenian Proverb
• The poor eat meat when they bite their tongues.~ Brazilian Proverb
• The smaller the heart, the longer the tongue. ~ Italian Proverb
• The soul of a fool is always dancing on the tip of his tongue. ~ Arabian Proverb
• The teeth sometimes bite the tongue. ~ Malawian Proverb
• The tongue has no bones, yet it breaks bones.~ Greek Proverb
• The tongue is like a sharp knife: it kills without drawing blood. ~ Anne Seaton
• The tongue is more to be feared than the sword. ~ Japanese Proverb
• The tongue is safe; even among thirty teeth.~ Indian Proverb
• The tongue is the only instrument that gets sharper with use.~ Washington Irving
• The tongue of experience utters the most truth.~ Arabian Proverb
• The tongue of men is the whip of God. ~ Iranian Proverb
• The tongue of the fool is always long. ~ Armenian Proverb
• The wise person has long ears and a short tongue.~ German Proverb
• Violence of the tongue is very real-sharper than any knife. ~ Mother Teresa
• When the eyes say one thing, and the tongue another, a practiced man relies on the language of the first. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson
• Where gold speaks every tongue is silent.~ Italian Proverb

• A fool who knows he is a fool has a little intelligence, but a fool that thinks he is intelligent is really a fool.~ Sanskrit Proverb
• Even though you know a thousand things, ask the man who knows one. ~ Turkish Proverb
• Happy is the man who knows he’s happy. ~ Chinese Proverb
• He is rich who knows when he has enough. ~ Japanese Proverb
• He who cannot light a fire knows nothing about love.~ Finnish Proverb
• He who does not know one thing knows another. ~ Kenyan Proverb
• He who enjoys good health is rich, though he knows it not.~ Italian Proverb
• He who has not tasted bitter things, knows not what sweet is. ~ German Proverb
• He who knows all the answers has not yet been asked all the questions. ~ Author Unknown
• He who knows he has enough is rich. ~ Lao-Tzu
• He who knows himself knows everybody. ~ Chinese Proverb
• He who knows his heart mistrusts his eyes. ~ Chinese Proverb
• He who knows how to be poor knows everything. ~ Jules Michelet
• He who knows how to live, knows enough.~ Spanish Proverb
• He who knows how to suffer everything can dare everything.~ Marquis De Vauvenargues
• He who knows little knows enough if he knows how to hold his tongue. ~ Italian Proverb
• He who knows little knows enough if he knows how to hold is tongue.~ Italian Proverb
• He who knows little quickly tells it.~ Italian Proverb
• He who knows much makes many mistakes.~ Turkish Proverb
• He who knows not, and knows not that he knows not, is a fool, shun him; He who knows not, and knows that he knows not, is a child, teach him. He who knows, and knows not that he knows, is asleep, wake him. He who knows, and knows that he knows, is wise, follow him. ~ Persian Proverb
• He who knows nothing, doubts nothing. ~ Brazilian Proverb
• He who knows nothing is as blind as him who cannot see.~ Spanish Proverb
• He who knows nothing neither doubts nor fears anything. ~ Mexican Proverb
• He who knows not shame does whatever he likes. ~ Egyptian Proverb
• He who knows not when he has enough, is poor. ~ Japanese Proverb
• He who knows only his own side of the case, knows little of that.~ John Stuart Mill
• He who knows others is clever; He who knows himself has discernment. ~ Lao-Tzu
• He who knows that enough is enough will always have enough. ~ Lao-Tzu
• He who knows the darkness shall learn to live in the light. ~ Author Unknown
• It is the wife who knows her husband. ~ Ghanaian Proverb
• Only he who knows his own weaknesses can endure those of others.~ Japanese Proverb
• The happy man is he who knows his limitations, yet bows to no false gods. ~ Robert W. Service
• The most happy man is he who knows how to bring into relation the end and beginning of his life.~ Goethe
• True luck consists not in holding the best cards at the table; luckiest he who knows just when to rise and go home. ~ John Hay
• What three men know then the whole world knows. ~ Norwegian Proverb
• Who does not know one thing knows another. ~ Kenyan Proverb
• Whoever knows how to use a pen never adds his own name to the “guilty” list. ~ Arabian Proverb
• Who knows the language is at home everywhere. ~ Dutch Proverb